Teej: Women’s Festival

Siddhi B. Ranjitkar

Teej is a Hindu women’s only festival. This festive is for women to enjoy good food on the eve of Teej, then to fast a whole day on the Teej day, visit the shrines to Lord Shiva dancing and singing on the way, make offerings to Lord Shiva and other deities, and break the fast on the third day morning after sun rise, and offer the god-blessed items to husbands. They take a rest on the fourth day only to fast on the fifth day again and perform purification rituals to atone for any wrongs they have done in the year, and then make offerings to seven ‘Rishis’ [1]. All these things happen from the second day to the fifth day of the light fortnight in August.

The second day of the light fortnight in August is the Teej eve. Nepalese Hindu women [2] begin merry-making, eating, dancing, playing cards and listening music on the eve of the Teej festival. They start with enjoying a large festive meal in the evening, and then playing, dancing, singing at night; they take breaks for eating and drinking in between the merry-makings; they continue to eat and drink until the dawn of the next day. This whole process is called ‘Dar-khanay’. [3]

They eat so much food on the night they do not feel hungry next day even after doing a lot of physical work of dancing, singing and traveling from one shrine to Lord Shiva to another. They get stamina to remain without food and drink for the whole day.

Maya is taking a Teej fast for the first time in her life. She is doing so to win Lord Shiva’s favor for having a spouse of her choice. Her sister Rani has been married for two years. It is mandatory for her to take a Teej fast for the long life of her husband.

“We are only two sisters; so we cannot make of this occasion much. The neighbors have five sisters. They have been playing cards, and eating a lot of food such as fruits, sweets and many other meat dishes for the whole night. I saw two crates of soft drink taken to their house. They must have consumed all those drinks too” thought Maya. Her thoughts are broken by the sudden question of her senior sister Rani

“Maya, have you seen the Teej gift I received from our brothers. They are so beautiful things. I did not expect for so many good things. I think our brothers have good jobs in this year; so they could purchase such beautiful gifts to you and me as well. Have you not checked the gifts, Maya?”

“Yes, I have. They are so nice. I will keep those things for future uses.”

Normally, married women go to their parents to celebrate Teej festival together with other sisters; however, all women might not be so lucky. For various reasons, some husbands or mothers-in-law might not send them to their parents’ home for the Teej festival, so, they might end up celebrating Teej festival at home and might end up doing all sorts of chores even on the Teej day for sisters-in-law and others to enjoy the day.

Parents of the married daughters send ‘dar-bhag’ to the mothers-in-law of their daughters on the Teej eve so that mothers-in-law in absence of daughters-in-law do not need to do anything for celebrating Teej festival.

“Maya, have you seen the ‘dar-bhag’ sent to our mom by the parents of our sister-in-law? They are supposed to send the best ‘dar-bhag’ in this first year of her marriage to our brother.”

“Do you know Maya what ‘dar-bhag,’ means? ‘Dar-bhag’ comprises a set of food items such as cooked meat and vegetables, sweets, fruits, a set of new outfit such as sari, blouse, petticoat, and sandal, a set of ornaments such as ‘pote’ (necklace of glass beads), golden ‘Tilhari‘ (a golden ornament worn by married women only), and ‘Tika’ (decoration on forehead), a set of ‘puja’ items such as 365 pieces of ‘datiwon’ (each piece is about 10 cm long cut from the stalks of a plant called ‘datiwon’ for brushing teeth 365 times), rice grains husked manually, cotton wicks soaked in vegetable oil, barley grains, sesame seeds and flowers. All these things together make a human porter load of ‘dar-bhag.’ “

“Do you know, Maya? Friends and relatives also send ‘dar-bhag’ but such ‘dar-bhag’ is reciprocated. However, such ‘dar-bhag’ is a much smaller than the first ‘dar-bhag’ sent by the parents of newly wed daughters.

“Maya, you are taking a Teej fast for the first time in your life. It is not as simple as you might think it. It is rather strenuous. The shrines to Lord Shiva are opened to women only on this day. You need to visit various shrines to Lord Shiva on this day without food and drink. Some women lining up at the entrance to the shrine to Lord Shiva at Pashupati in Kathmandu get fainted due to the hot August sun shining brilliantly over head. Women wishing to make offerings to Lord Shiva are so many that the line of women makes about two kilometers long at Pashupati in Kathmandu on this day. Almost all the Kathmandu Hindu women visit Lord Shiva at Pashupati. You may need to line up for almost a half day on the Teej day to reach Lord Shiva. So, you have to brace up for the hot sunny day of August.”

“Women dressed in red visit as many shrines to Lord Shiva as possible elsewhere in the country on this day. Here, in Kathmandu, we visit shrines to Lord Shiva in the areas such as Bagmati, Sankhamul, and Kalmochan. After visiting the shrines to Lord Shiva, we visit Chaityas (Buddhist shrines) too at Pashupati. We go around 108 Chaityas on the premises of Pashupati after performing worship for Lord Pashupati (local name of Lord Shiva) to make sure that our husbands will be in good health and have long lives. The figure 108 is the most auspicious for both Hindus and Buddhists.”

“Rani didi, do the Buddhist women also take the Teej fast?”

“No, Maya, they do not need to take it, however, any woman may celebrate it for the long life of her husband, and however, it is not mandatory for the women of the faith other than the Hindu.”

“Rani didi, how should we start the Teej festival?”

“Maya, at dawn we will take a purification dip in a river; then, I will don my bridal sari and blouse, red glass bracelets, and red tika: all are of red color and the symbols of happiness. Some women think red is amorous color, so, the bridal dress is made of red color only. Married women dressed in red, look more like brides on this day than on the wedding day. I will wear the large and thick necklace of green glass beads around neck and right limb on top of the red blouse and sari. I received this necklace from the bridegroom on the wedding day, and save it throughout my life as a symbol of happy marriage.”

“Maya, You, however, have the choice of dress you like to don on this occasion because you are not married yet. Then, we walk from one shrine to Lord Shiva to another, on the way singing and dancing. This is strenuous too. Not all women could do it. Currently, women of rich families take cars to visit different shrines to Lord Shiva. Believers think that is not the right way of revering the supreme god and celebrating the Teej festival; you cannot earn merits simply visiting shrines to Lord Shiva, you need to work hard physically. If you want to have the blessing of the Lord, you need to walk to the shrines to Lord Shiva. Some women believe that if they can dance to the satisfaction of Lord Shiva on this day they will be angels in the heaven after death.”

“Maya, this is the good opportunity for women to express their grievances too. They sing songs on the way to the shrines to Lord Shiva airing how their mothers-in-law and other family members particularly the sisters-in-law treat them and how they live in difficulties and wants, and what problems they have. Some women get moved so much they even cry while singing such songs. Thus, women express their difficulties and injustice done to them in songs. Some samples of Teej songs are: Parents accommodate all sons in the house but they send off even a single daughter across the hill. Parents become aliens for their daughters after the marriage. They do not come for daughters to take home even on Teej. Let us sing with heart and soul in the villages and the towns; let us forget all the troubles given by the mothers-in-law and the sisters-in-law. Let us be happy at least on this day. Mothers-in-law have their own concern too. So, they sing in turn: We had pinned all our hopes on daughters-in-law for our happiness but they took away even our sons leaving us high and dry. These are the traditional Teej songs but we have some modern songs too. Examples are: daughters and sons are the children of the same parents. Daughters need to have equal rights to the parental property as sons do. Children of the same parents need not to suffer from discrimination in the twenty first century. These are only a few samples of songs women sing on the Teej day. You can listen to a variety of songs if you have patience to watch the Teej dance and listen to the Teej songs.”

“This is also the only day when women do not need to cook and do other chores; they get a day off from the household work, they don the best and move freely; thus, this is an unusual day for Nepalese women.”

“Maya, we return home in the evening after visiting various shrines to Lord Shiva on the way dancing and singing. We take a third shower in the evening. Thereafter, we continue our fasting. You may drink something if you like after lighting a lamp in the evening. Some women keep awake the whole night chanting religious hymns; others simply rest and sleep with empty stomachs. Maya, you may do whatever you like; you are still unmarried.”

“Rani didi, what will we do next day?”

“Maya, next day we get up early in the morning, and then take a dip in water to purify our bodies, and then make offerings to Lord Sun-god as soon as it rises, and to Uma-Maheswore another names of Parvati and Shiva. Then we offer god-blessed food called ‘prasad’ and flowers as the blessing from Lord Shiva to our husbands. Thereafter, we can break the Teej fast eating whatever we like. Then we take a rest the whole day. This is the fourth day of the light fortnight night in August, and the second day of the four-day Teej festival.

Nepalis believe that the fourth day of the light fortnight night in August is the birthday of Lords Ganesh [4]. So, they make special offerings to Lord Ganesh on this day. Some Nepalis believe that it is not auspicious to take a look at the moon on this night. So, they hide from moon.”

“On the fifth day, Maya, we go to Teku to take a holy dip in the water of the confluence of two holy rivers called Bagmati and Vishnumati. After taking a holy dip and purifying our body, we perform worship for Lord Shiva called Rikhayswore there; thereafter, we perform worship for seven ‘Rishis”. So, this fifth day of the light fortnight in August is also called Rishi Panchami means fifth day of ‘Rishis’.

“Women’s only religious fair is held at Teku in Kathmandu on this day. No male creatures are allowed in to this area for keeping the privacy of women, as we have to take a holy dip in the open river. We need to brush our teeth 365 times, and then take purification dips in water 365 times and so on. We will not be able to do all these things in presence of males there. We do all these things on this day to atone for any wrong we have unknowingly done in the year. Therefore, on this day men lose their rights to visit this area. Some women after the worship for Rikhayswore and seven ‘Rishis’ make a pilgrimage to Goddess Bijeswori [5] to the north west of Teku on the right bank of Vishnumati River in Kathmandu.”

“Rani didi, what about women living in other parts of Nepal, where do they visit for a purification dip on this day?”

“Maya, they visit the nearest confluence of rivers, if they do not have such a confluence, they go to the nearest river, if they do not have even a river, they go to the nearest water source and take a purification dip, and then perform worship for Lord Rikhayswore and seven ‘Rishis.”

“Maya, you may like to know about the origin of this festival. Nobody knows historical date of its origin but people believe that Goddess Parvati herself has set the tradition of Teej festival. The story goes like this. A monarch called Himalaya had a beautiful daughter called Parvati. When she crossed the teenage years, Narad-muni: devotee of Lord Vishnu came to the monarch and asked him the hands of Parvati for Lord Vishnu – one of the Hindu Trinity [6]. The monarch readily agreed to the proposal without asking Parvati for her consent, and not knowing her mind because she had already reached the puberty and Lord Vishnu was a right person for her to marry.

Parvati got upset when she came to know that her father gave his approval of giving her in marriage to Lord Vishnu. She, however, had already dedicated her mind and body to Lord Shiva. She began losing her weight because of her anxiety of getting married with Vishnu. She could not dare to go to her parents and asked her father to change his mind on the marriage proposal. Her physical conditions deteriorated.

Her friends were extremely worried to see her in such bad conditions. They wanted to assist her but Parvati did not disclose the reasons for being so sad even to her close friends. One of her friends ultimately persuaded her to tell the truth. Finally, she shared her secrets with the friends.

Sensing the seriousness of the situation, her friends thought out a plan to take her to a solitary place so that she would be able to meditate on Lord Shiva, and then please him to accept her as his spouse. Without the knowledge of her parents, they, therefore, took Parvati to an unknown place, and guarded her in secret creating an environment conducive to Parvati dedicate her life and deeds to Lord Shiva. Parvati spent days and nights in fasting, meditating and performing worship for Lord Shiva. Some Nepalese women try to emulate Parvati making offerings to an idol of Lord Shiva made of sand at home during the Teej night.

Ultimately, Lord Shiva appeared before Parvati, and said to her, “I am pleased very much with your dedication and devotion to me, if you are doing all these things with a wish in your mind, please let me know; your wish will be met.”

Parvati said, “My Lord, I am doing all these things for getting you as my husband; please do me a favor accepting me as your spouse.”

Lord Shiva could not say, “No” as he has already given his words to Parvati that he would meet any desire she would have in her mind.

Lord Shiva quietly accepted Parvati as his spouse. This happened on the third day of the light fortnight in August. Since then unmarried women have begun to make offerings to Lord Shiva for the favor of having husbands of their choice; and married women for the long and prosperous lives of their husbands. People believe that thus the tradition of Teej has been set since then. Nepalis call this festival also as Haritalika. Harit means kidnapped; alika means friends. Parvati’s friends kidnapped her and made her success in getting her wish met by Lord Shiva.”

“Maya, thus, we enjoy the Teej festival eating, dancing and merry-making for a prosperous and long lives of husbands. Most probably by now, you know how women are dedicated to their husbands; how women pray to the almighty Lord Shiva for the long lives of their husbands; how they atone for any wrongdoing in the year. Our forefathers and foremothers must have set this tradition of Teej to renew the marriage vows, and to keep the conjugal life as happy as possible. Therefore, we celebrate this festival with great enthusiasm every year.”

Footnotes

[1] Rishis are the most venerated Hindu holy men

[2] I do not know why Nevah Hindu women don’t take the Teej fast. Most probably they do not need to worry about widowhood as they were married to Lord Vishnu before they reached puberty.

[3] Eat as much as they can until dawn. Traditionally, Nepalis consider a day starts at dawn. Next day, they do not drink even a drop of water. They need to survive a whole day without food and drink. They may drink water or anything else only in the evening after turning lights on.”

[4] Lord Ganesh is the son of Lord Shiva and Parvati

[5] Bijeswori is the Goddess of love.

[6] Brahma, Vishnu and Maheswore are the members of the Hindu Trinity. Maheswore is another name for Lord Shiva. Brahma is the creator; Vishnu is the administrator of the world; Maheswore is for ending life in the Hindu world.

This year Teej starts on August 22, 2009 and ends on August 24, 2009.